Real Talk: How To Tell Your Mom Or Future-Mother-In-Law You Don’t Want A Bridal Shower


Are you hoping to escape the dreaded bridal shower and be able to remember the experience? Don’t let family or acquaintances convince you it’s mandatory If you’re unsure about one. Let us guide you through this tricky issue…

The more I speak to women planning to get married, the more often I get the question, “How do I get out from the bridal shower? !”

This isn’t meant to denigrate anyone bride looking to have a bridal shower. We’re eager to assist you if you be in the market! We’ve just shared items that are perfect for the wedding shower and also have plenty of entertaining tips about the topic.

There seem to be no options or resources for brides who hate having a bridal shower but have no plans to have an event like a bridal shower. With increasingly modern brides abandoning wedding traditions, we’re here to be a part of the solution! Every bride should be able to enjoy their wedding in the way they would like rather than how others would like it to be. We’re sick of hearing our family, friends, and even bloggers tell brides they’ll regret not doing XYZ…’

The truth is that there was no way I could have an engagement party. It was never even thought of by me. I never thought anyone would suggest it when we were engaged. Things like this are old-fashioned wedding customs – aren’t “me.”

It’s also clear that I’m not alone. My closest friend, an essential influencer on Bridal Musings, declared “over my dead body” when confronted with the thought. Within the last month, I’ve heard from brides trying to stay out of the bridal showers they were pushed into.

So, what’s going on? Why do so many brides being told that “you must have a bridal shower”? What can we do to convince people that it’s not our style? Initially, I’d like to outline why you may not be a good candidate for hosting a bridal shower. I want my brides to feel valued and heard; perhaps, their families and friends will also see this.

Valid reasons not to have a bridal shower:

It’s not your thing to play games at parties and bridal shower customs.

Presenting presents in front of crowds of people isn’t a good idea.

You live with your fiancé, don’t need any gifts, and don’t have a registry for your wedding.

Wedding shower sex and wedding suggestions feel awkward.

You’re not in the area where the party is held or have any acquaintances who are coming.

Feeling pressured to invite everyone to your reception is not a good idea.

The family members or your mother you’d like to have there died.

Showers for brides aren’t an integral part of your wedding traditions.

The bridal showers are considered outdated.

It’s not in your wedding plan.

You’re eloping.

Any other reason?

Now we’ve proven you’re not the only one with thoughts and feelings. Here are the top suggestions with my best friends on informing your mother, your future mother-in-law, or whoever else is arranging the wedding that you don’t want to host a bridal shower. (Oh, by my way, I’ve explained the best ways to inform your family and friends who aren’t supportive of your bridal plan).

Be direct.

When there is conflict within the group, it’s helpful to suggest what you’d like. It’s tempting to be extra polite and gentle when approaching. However, I don’t think this is the best way to come here. If you don’t wish to host a bridal shower or any other event, inform the person planning the party (or their representative) that it’s not something you’d want. If you’re unsure of your thoughts, try to make a statement instead. If you aren’t active in your communication, they might think you’re not interested in receiving gifts or hosting parties.

Do you need help in crafting your argument? Here you go…

“Hi, insert name here,

Thank you for the opportunity to organize an event for my bridal shower. I cannot say enough how grateful I am that you’d like to contribute your time and talents to organize a celebration to honor me. I feel loved and loved!

While I am incredibly grateful for the sentiment and gesture, I’m going to inform you that an event for a wedding shower is an option that I never would. It’s nice of you to consider it. However, I’ll need to say no, as this isn’t my style (or put another reason there). I hope you know I am very grateful and will forever be thankful for your generosity!

Thank you for making me feel so happy. We should be together soon and celebrate.

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